im so naturally funny because my life is a joke
I think we all need to go out into an empty field and just scream for about an hour.
- (I am working a morning shift at a cafe. We are serving breakfast. A little boy and his mother enter the cafe.)
- Me: “So, what will it be?”
- Child: “I WISH TO DEVOUR THE UNBORN.”
- (There is a sudden silence and everyone turns to look. The mother looks very embarrassed.)
- Mother: “Eggs… he would like some eggs…”
- Rolling Stone: Did you know Frank Ocean was gay before he came out last year?
- Tyler, the Creator: Yeah, I was one of the first people he told. I kinda knew, because he likes Pop Tarts without frosting on them, so I knew something was weird. But that's my nigga.